I can only please one person a day. Today isn’t your day. Tomorrow doesn’t look good either.

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I can only please one person a day. Today isn’t your day. Tomorrow doesn’t look good either.

-- Anonymous

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Here’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.

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My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary column.

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Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.

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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

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