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When you mess up a guy's hair, he thinks it's cute, but when you mess up a girl's hair, just hope you're wearing something bulletproof.
-- Anonymous
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You’re telling me, a chicken fried this rice.
-- Anonymous
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You have Facebook? Yup. You have Whatsapp? Yup. You have love? Forgot to install it.
-- Anonymous
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Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.
-- Cary Grant
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My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary column.
-- Norm Crosby
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Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.
-- Anonymous
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