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I’m so tired, the bags under my eyes are bigger than my boobs.
-- Anonymous
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Stop having so many birthdays! Seriously, each year it gets more difficult to find you a gift.
-- Anonymous
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That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.
-- George Carlin
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My prince is not coming on a white horse… He’s obviously riding a turtle, and definitely lost.
-- Ayshu
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Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages.
-- Louis Pasteur
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If we sip the wine, we find dreams coming upon us out of the imminent night.
-- D. H. Lawrence
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