I was gonna give you something awesome for your birthday, but the mailman made me get out of the mailbox.

Quotern

I was gonna give you something awesome for your birthday, but the mailman made me get out of the mailbox.

-- Anonymous

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Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

-- Anonymous

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Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out. – Phyllis Diller

-- Vijayaraj

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Keep calm and love a short girl.

-- Anonymous

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We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.

-- ~ Epictetus

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I work to buy a car to go to work.

-- Anonymous

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