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Old people at weddings always poke me and say you’re next so I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
-- Anonymous
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My family is temperamental. Half temper. Half mental.
-- Anonymous
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If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
-- Steven Wright
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Dad, how does it feel having the best son in the world?’ I don’t know, ask your grandfather… –
-- Unknown
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Penicillin cures, but wine makes people happy.
-- Anonymous
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The only difference between men and boys is the price of their toys!
-- Anonymous
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